Today: Apr 19, 2024

Inside the struggle of long distance relationships and how to maintain them

Kelsey Mix – Online Editor/Copy Editor

Long distance relationships are tough. Many wonder if they’re worth it or not, including myself. I’ve been in a long distance relationship before and all that resulted from it was heartbreak and regret. It actually really wasn’t that drastic, but it sucked.

Although there are many downfalls to dating someone 1,000 miles away from you, some people have been able to make it work. How, you say? I’m wondering the same thing. There are tons of tips online and in magazines that couples everywhere swear by. There’s even a WikiHow page dedicated to ways you can better your long distance relationship. And most of the tips are pretty helpful!

One of which is to be on the same page with your partner. If one partner isn’t as honest and trustworthy as the other, that partner could end up breaking up with the other—or worse, resort to cheating.

For most couples, a phone conversation, Skype call or texting 24/7 isn’t going to cut it. You need to do things together even though the distance is physically separating you. My friend in a long distance relationship always watches Netflix with her boyfriend. Their Friday nights consist of a whole lot of Parks and Rec and eating take out on Skype. Adorable, right?

Even though a phone conversation is the more traditional—and boring—way to talk to a partner that lives miles away, you should communicate at least once a day somehow. If you don’t, you’ll lose your connection and there will be nothing keeping you both together. Just simply talking about your day, asking for advice or ranting about a co-worker will spark conversation and allow you two to keep in touch. Just don’t talk too much and smother the other person. Find the fine line between the two and you’re golden.

What some may like about this type of relationship is the fact that you’re not constantly around the person you’re with. It gives you more time to yourself and makes the time you actually see them more special. Although some may like that aspect of the relationship, it’s not for everybody.

With this kind of relationship you either have the controlling aspect or you don’t. If you’re one to try to control the other person, it’s very hard to do that in a long distance relationship and it may not be for you. You’ll drive yourself crazy trying to control someone over 100 miles away from you.

You shouldn’t want to control your partner, but if you’re on the receiving end of that you’ll probably also want to rip your hair out. This is why both partners need to be on the same playing field because if you’re not, it’s really hard to make the relationship work.

Just like in any serious relationship, you both need to consider your future together. If you’re serious enough, you need to discuss where you’ll end up living together and how you’ll get to that point. If you don’t think your relationship is going to get that far or your partner won’t make certain sacrifices for you, you might need to reconsider.

Lastly, the most important thing is to make the effort to visit them. In a relationship, you need to want to be around the other person—otherwise, what’s the point? Spending time with them should be cherished because it won’t happen often if you’re in a long distance relationship. Even if “often” for you two is twice a month, make it happen. Every second with them is going to be worth it if you try.

If you’re not one to invest in a long distance relationship, try it. You never know what can happen. And if you’re currently struggling in a long distance relationship right now, just be positive. It’s going to be more work than a normal relationship, but if you really love your partner and want to be with them, it’s possible.

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