SPOOF: Mythical Animal Rights Association to protest Game of Thrones

Max Bickley – General Assignment Reporter

In the history of activism, one of the most well-known groups is PETA or People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. They have protested the fur industry, meat processing industry and any major area in society where animal mistreatment was known or exposed.

However, a new group has formed, named the MARA, Mythical Animal Rights Association. They have  moved on for higher and larger goals as they have begun to protest the unethical treatment of dragons in the hit series “Game of Thrones.”

Now, this is no far-stretch for animal activist groups like MARA as the mistreatment of fictional and mythical creatures has been protested before; when “Battlefield 3” was released PETA protested the abuse of a rat which was killed within the first section of the game. However, after the learning of Khaleesi Daenerys Targaryen locking up her two dragons in a dungeon in chains, the members of MARA broke into action.

The main purpose of this new organization was to allow the protest against the abuses of mythical and magical creatures who are taken advantage of by Hollywood and communities across the world. Also mentioned on the agenda of MARA was to abolish the practice of using Kestrels to pull carriages at Hogwarts, citing it as an “inhumane method of forced labor on creatures not meant to be commonly seen by humans.”

While that may be later on in the agenda, the members of MARA have been on a two year long voyage to Meereen to meet with Khaleesi Daenerys Targaryen and petition her for the release of her dragons in custody, and relinquish her claim to the free dragon as well. In their argument they plan to present that the dragons previously went extinct due to the mistreatment by the Valyrians, though this is debated by historians, and that further captivity would only harm the chances of survival.  Upon hearing of the Khaleesi actually riding upon her dragon, the members of MARA became even more devoted to their cause and are willing to go any length to find equality for the Dragons of Westeros, Mereen, and the rest of the world.

In their planning stages, the members of MARA were unaware of the dangerous which would face them, and have spent their time not only learning the languages of Valyrian and Dothraki, but have also been researching what other mistreatment of animals there might be in these far off lands. A second pressing matter discovered by MARA was the controversy over wargs and their abilities.

MARA member Donahugh O’Shaughnassee, who joined after discovering the discrimination of talking animals in Narnia, commented on the goal and aims of the organization.

“Currently we are working on freeing the dragons from the control of Khaleesi Daenerys. We understand it is a much different culture, but the fact of the matter stands that no dragon should be in custody like that,” said O’Shaughnassee. “Also the fact that wargs can willingly become an animal, I believe they merit protection as well as a mythical focal point of all animal species.”

While this opinion is debated within the group, much can be said about their conviction and determination. They are expected to arrive within the Southern Isles by summer’s end, and plan on making the journey to Meereen in the weeks following their arrival.

Photo Credit: Kyla Duhamel

This article was apart of the Spoof April Fool’s Series. Story information and sources presented are fictional.

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