Dear Dr. Strangelove,
My current girlfriend and I have been together for a few months, and everything is straight with us. We haven’t gotten to the stage of problems or fights in our relationship just yet. However, I have this growing insecurity in the back of my mind about her and my friend. My buddy hooked up with my girl once a couple of years ago in college, and I’ve known about that since then. We just ran into each other months ago and hit it off. I can’t help but wonder if my friend and my girl still have a sexual thing for each other. Is this worth bringing up?
-Paranoid Pal
Dear Paranoid Pal,
The last thing you want to do is start conflict or make your girlfriend feel like she has contributed to a downturn in your relationship. However, trust is one of the most important things in a relationship. If you let this thing get bigger, every little thing your girlfriend does is going to make you second-guess her motives. You guys never mentioned or joked about this before? Try bringing it up as a joke to see how she reacts, or simply discuss it with her in a way so that it carries on as a calm, mature conversation without looking like a psycho. But there’s no need to call it out unless she specifically does something to make you think there’s something going on. You just need to be reassured the relationship is fine.
-Dr. Strangelove
