Today: Apr 14, 2024

Spoof: Editor’s Note-SCSU police stepping up

The university has officially announced students will be arrested for jaywalking on Fitch Street and Farnham Avenue starting next week.

Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure arresting students for not walking “properly” is a little extreme. Don’t our hard-working police officers have more serious issues to tend to, like underage drinking or parking on campus without a pass?

Supposedly, Southern police will be hiding in bushes and helicopters will be patrolling overhead. They will also be on top of the Adanti Student Center so they have a bird’s eye view of students trying to illegally cross Fitch Street: they will then signal police who are stationed on the ground. Police officers will also be hiding out in the parking lot across the street from Farnham Hall to catch students.

What’s next: snipers?

Southern authority has made this decision after several close accidents on the streets: students often cross the street without looking because they are on their phones or they feel waiting for a crosswalk is too time-consuming.

I understand crossing the street while caught up in a hot sexting conversation can be a little distracting. I also understand the dangers of crossing the street without even looking for traffic. But shouldn’t drivers be driving more carefully? After all, this is a college campus and students are trying to get to class.

I recall one time sophomore year I was halfway across Farnham Avenue—I was on the white lines—and a lady obviously did not see me and came inches from hitting me. I was on my way to give a presentation to class, so I was already nervous. But this was the icing on the cake. This just proves drivers are just as guilty as walkers.

I will admit, I live in Schwartz Hall now and have a habit of hitting the Fitch Street crosswalk and walking if there isn’t any oncoming traffic. Once in a while I feel bad if I make cars wait after I’ve long-crossed the road. But in my defense, if it’s raining, I’d rather not get drenched on my way to class waiting for the glowing white figure to appear on the crosswalk.

Crossing the street is like the old game “Frogger,” as you’re trying to dodge oncoming traffic without getting hit by a city bus or a truck. I’m always up for the adventure though, even if it means putting my life on the line.

I figure if I skip across the street instead, I won’t get handcuffed, and I can make it to class on time.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Latest from Blog