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Muslim Diaries


Day 3 of my Muslim Journey

Feb. 8, 2012

I woke up at 5 a.m. for my first prayer today and took a nap in between before I started my second one. I was disappointed when I woke up late and slept through my second prayer as well as the classes I was supposed to have today. All I can think about now is what a horrible start to my day this is, and I feel like I didn’t just let myself down, but most importantly I have let Allah down.

It is only the third day and I am starting to doubt myself, and I don’t think my body or mind is used to this daily process or routine. It makes me think of how committed and loyal Muslims are to God by making this a part of their lives and how it happens so naturally for them. Maybe that explains why I am physically and mentally reacting to it because I am not used to it. Although I missed my prayer today and I am upset about that, I feel good knowing that everything I am doing is for the reason I am even alive. I am not bending down on my knees praying to Allah five times a day because the religion tells me I have to, it is much deeper than that; I am having a sudden epiphany. Today was a lesson for me.

I am giving back love and thanks in return for my life and all the glories that have come with it thus far and will continue to come my way. After all, I wouldn’t even be able to wake up and see the light of a new day if it wasn’t for the blessing of Allah.

An acquaintance from one of my classes came to my dorm so I could copy the homework I missed today. We have spoken a few times, and I wondered why he never asked me about my hijab or why he didn’t express any curiosity in what I was doing. I couldn’t help but ask him why he never questioned me about it after I explained my five-day journey to him.

He tells me he served our country in Afghanistan and had seen many Muslim women wearing the hijabs, so it was normal to him. His response brought me back to the interview assignment we had to do in that class and how I had already knew that about him from my previous questioning. Even so, I didn’t connect the two in my head at the time. After realizing it, I think it is interesting to hear the point of view of an American that has been exposed to the culture and religion. Today had its ups and downs, but I’m taking it as a life lesson on this Muslim Journey, one step at a time.

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