Today: Jul 14, 2024

Points of virginity

Jasmine Wilborne, Staff Writer:
After class, Catholic schoolgirls are sometimes stereotyped as being wild promiscuous chicks who bounce from bed to bed with the ease of a stone skip¬ping water. Pre-marital sex has become a cheap commodity wrapped in shiny, colorful condoms easily purchasable by 13-year-old boys who still believe in cooties. There’s something wrong with this. I was a Catholic school girl and have not engaged in any wild orgies. I have kept my hands to myself and here’s why.
Your first time is like cutting out your heart, placing it in a jar and giving it to that one person forever. Sex is the most intimate activity any two people can engage in. It isn’t your grandma’s kiss. It’s much more. One day, I will stand exposed, vulnerable and naked before my hubby, and we will experi¬ence an embrace of intense sensual and psychological explosions. This singular physical moment, fleeting in pleasure, lasting in effect, will bind us together emotionally. Because we will partake in each other’s pleasure and solidify our trust through the flesh, we will be unit¬ed. In essence we will say, “Here I am. Receive only me and I will receive only you!” I don’t want to say these words to anyone but my husband. Condoms are 99 percent effective in preventing STD’s but 1 percent effective in pre¬venting emotional attachment. Save yourself.
Most relationships are unpredict¬able, mistakes in hindsight and end in heartbreak. I will wait until marriage to have sex because: I am right now, immature and incapable of handling the great responsibility that’s packed up in sex. Instead, I will go back to the original purpose of dating which is: interviewing men for the job of spouse. Dating is not a toy but a tool intended to help two people “imagine” what a mar¬riage would look like. Besides, if your boo truly loved you, your finger would be embellished in gold, a universal sign that says, “You’re mine.”
Believe in the wisdom of the Baker. If sex is a cake, God is the baker that wrote the recipe. Recipes, like rules, prevent us from messing up and hurt¬ing ourselves or others. I think that God made sex to be more than something that feels good. He made this recipe for the most intense human intimacy pos¬sible, just to be enjoyed by two commit¬ted people through marriage. Ignoring the recipe for great, pure and harmless sex can result in regret if you break up, trust issues if you are cheated on, sexual addiction due to exploitation, physical damages like STDs, various emotional damages, physical abuses such as rape, unplanned pregnancy which can lead to abortion or baby mama drama. The risks of premarital sex are endless. But they are limited if you save yourself.
I’m not naïve; I know that a lot of you have passed by your “first time”. But I think that there is still hope for a new start. Regardless of your past, the God I believe in meets us where we are. He takes what we’ve messed up and transforms it into something new. You can still turn back and start again. Follow the recipe, trust the Baker: Everyone is not doing it; save yourself for marriage.


  1. This whole article is a joke. Get off of your high horse, acting like you’re better than others because your saving yourself. I respect those who hold that belief; not those who hold it and feel superior and try to preach that to others.

    Plus, get your facts straight; Condoms HELP prevent STD’s, and are only 75% successful in doing so.

    “Most relationships are unpredict¬able, mistakes in hindsight and end in heartbreak” ; Oh, so you speak on behalf of everyone that has had a break-up? I must have missed that part.

    And you say you are too immature for sex, but you are ready to find a husband, or to “interview” for a husband? Dating is a completely different image than marriage, you cannot even compare the two. There are so many factors that go into each scenario. Plus, if your “boo” truly loved you, you wouldn’t need gold or a ring to know that. If showing love to you requires gold, then what does that say? Materialistic much?

    Marriage does not prevent any of those. Being married does not bar you from sex addiction, STD’s, emotional/ trust issues. You say you are not naïve but you sound, and write like you are.If you consider having sex as “messing up”, well, it’s my favorite mess-up to have.

    By the way, if you want this to be your profession, you may want to ditch words like “boo”, “baby mama”, and “hubby”. I felt like I just read an article written by a 14 year old high school girl.

    • Dear reader,

      Thank you for your reply. When I write stuff I want people to have dialogue about it later…to mull it over and contemplate the main points. It isn’t meant to condemn people or make them feel bad ( although the frankness of my writing and the generalities I make towards modern culture will offend alot of people).

      1) I do not think I am better than anyone who isn’t or hasn’t saved themselves. I wrote this article so that people who were and weren’t having sex could understand why I wasn’t having sex and my reasoning behind it. You shouldn’t feel offended because I have decided to a) call out those who do have sex which is biblically a sin b) explain why I don’t have sex and c) help others who are having it see the dangers/risks/emotional damages that might come from having it outside of marriage. If you can watch Lady Gaga and various other pop culture stars take jabs at the Church, religion or morality and ethics…you can listen to me fight agaisnt it.

      2) I don’t have sex so technically it doesn’t matter to me how good a condom is. Most information people know because it is directly relevant to them…this isn’t. And I was making a point.

      3) I said most relationships are…the majority of people who get married they do not marry their true love. Doesn’t make it a mistake but they could not PREDICT that this person would be there husband. Besides, I was again trying to make a general point.

      4) I am too immature to handle the RESPONSIBILITIES OF SEX (outside of marraige) …which I wrote in my article. Its too much. When I get married which is different from dating ( I marry the person who passed the interview for spouse) it is different…imperfect still but more stable than dating your current boyfriend/girlfriend.

      5) You missed the point of the gold ring aspect. I was talking about the universal sign of commitment and love through marriage…aka a gold band.

      6) So many people within the English academia and without have complemented my writing for being clear, funny and overall high in quality.

      P.S sorry this is so late.

  2. * sorry typo “The do not marry their true love” what I meant was most people believe they are going to marry someone and then they don’t. They marry the person they never considered or years before would have never even thought to.

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