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It’s just us two baby…oh and everyone else

10/18/2010
By:

Samantha McKelvie

Staff Writer

If there is one thing that I learned about being in a relationship, it’s that more often than not, other people and outside forces screw up the relationship rather than the people actually in it. Although it sounds ridiculous, it’s something that I have witnessed time and time again.

So who and what are these outside forces sabotaging your relationship, you ask? It’s those friends that are putting things in your head about the way things should or shouldn’t be in your relationship, making you think about stuff that had never even crossed your mind.

It’s your family members who are telling you that someone is no good for you because they care about you too much and no one is ever good enough for their kid. It’s those people who don’t even know you or anything about your relationship but feel that they need to stick their noses where they don’t belong.

It’s those social networking sites such as Facebook that put your relationship out there for the world to see, essentially hurting it more than helping it.

And last but not least, it’s those relationship experts or articles telling you what entails a good relationship and what you should or shouldn’t do: don’t come off too eager or too nonchalant, don’t come off too needy or too independent, don’t call or call. Well here’s what I have to say about all of that nonsense.

Forget what you’re told, forget what you see, forget what you read and think for yourself.

If you didn’t care before that your boyfriend didn’t buy you flowers then why do you care now? Because your best friend pointed out that he should? Oh and I bet you didn’t think it was a big deal that he said hi to that girl until your friend made you think that a simple hello was a flirt fest.

Whether it’s intentional or unintentional, I noticed that friends like to put things in our heads that weren’t even there before, creating problems that otherwise wouldn’t have been problems. They’re like backseat drivers for relationships, and they’re driving your relationship right into the ground!

If your boyfriend or girlfriend treats you right, don’t sweat the little things. Maybe your friend is bitter and just wants someone to buy her flowers.

Family is also another force that may get in the way of your relationship. There’s always the mother who thinks no girl is good enough for her son or the father who doesn’t approve of anyone less than Superman for his daughter. Don’t let this discourage you or second guess your relationship. If you love your significant other and they love you, then your family should be happy for you and move on.

And screw those “Do’s and Don’ts” articles about relationships or what someone says about how you should act in front of your girl or guy. If you’re acting like anyone other than yourself, or doing something that you wouldn’t normally do, then all you’re doing is fooling the other person along with yourself. Then what happens later when this person you’re with realizes that you weren’t who they thought you were?

Here’s some advice: Just be yourself! And if someone doesn’t like whoever that may be, then you don’t need them. You are who you are and your significant other should see who that is from the start.

So here’s the bottom line — screw what people say and follow your heart! Don’t listen to those people in your ear. If you are fine with not getting flowers then why should it bother anybody else? If you think things are going good, then tell your friend, sister, mother to let you live.

The last time I checked, a relationship was between two people, not between two people and the entire world. Besides, they don’t know everything that goes on in your relationship anyway, so who are they to make judgments? Don’t let other people tell you how your relationship should or shouldn’t be because everyone is different and everyone does things differently.

If you’re in a healthy relationship and no one is being physically, mentally, or emotionally abused then, there shouldn’t be a problem as far as anyone else is concerned. If YOU are happy, that’s all that should matter.

Forget about everything else. There should only be a problem in the relationship if you think there is one.

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